I’ve never had any serious issues with my weight or diet or body image, etc. I’ve had friends that used to restrict but I could never do it because 1) I love food and eating and 2) I hate throwing up. I did used to weigh myself almost daily in high school and steadily disliked the numbers I saw more and more but I never did anything serious about, positive or negative.
I know I’m not fat. I have a little excess weight that I wouldn’t mind getting rid of. I eat terribly and never exercise, which I could and should change.
I just looked up a BMI calculator and double-checked my height and weight. I’m at the high end for “normal” or whatever. I dunno why I’m even writing about this.
I hate it when men honk at me or holler at me or whistle at me or ogle me or whatever when I’m walking outside, no matter what they look like or who they are. I am not walking here so you can see me. I did not get up and get dressed today for you.
After dropping off my car at the auto repair shop today, I was walking a short distance down the road to a bus stop when I hear a car horn. I turn, although I should know better by now not to, to see what it’s about, and a truck speeds by me with the passenger practically hanging out the window waving at me. I’m thinking, seriously? Did you just get your driving buddy to honk at me for you so you could… notify me that you think I have a nice ass? Or that both of you think I have a nice ass? Or something? I honestly don’t understand. I mean, I know I’m hot fucking shit and no one can tell me otherwise, so that’s not hard to understand (if you can’t read the slight sarcasm in that sentence…), but really? A girl walking on the street. You don’t have any idea who she is and she doesn’t know you. What’s the point? Are you so insecure about your masculinity and power over women that you feel like drive-by violations of my comfort are what you need?
It pisses me off, and I know it pisses off a lot of other girls, or at least makes them feel uncomfortable, and I don’t think most of them can express why, so they just don’t mention it to anyone. But I’m a little sick of it at this point. School has been back in session for less than two full weeks and I’ve already been honked at, whistled at, and leered at by men in cars and construction workers. They’re doing work at a lot of places on campus, and in the morning, the men like to sit along a road I walk up to get to class to have breakfast and coffee and smoke cigarettes, and they all sit in a line up the curb of this road, and when I round the corner, they watch me walk up, and they watch me walk all the way past them. They don’t stare like that at anyone else who walks by. This is not an innocent people-watching stare. This is not something they do unconsciously because they’re bored. They have coffee, they have breakfast, they have cigarettes, they have their coworkers to talk to if they’re bored. They’d rather spend their morning looking at some co-ed’s ass as she tries to get to class. They literally stop everything to watch you move.
It’s not different when I’m back home, either, although I’m usually never out by myself like I am at UNC. But when I went downtown with my sister this summer, the stream of “Hello beautiful ladies!” and the like were endless.
I know that men who do these kinds of things stop thinking about it moments after they’ve done it. It’s not a big deal to them. But the girls they do it to remember it, and they don’t necessarily forget as easily.
And that’s my rant for the day.
ADDENDUM: GOD why do men even honk at me and shit, I’m almost always wearing frumpy, sweaty athletic clothes and a ponytail because I’m on my way to the gym or back from it, JESUS CHRIST
aka if you support anti-abortion laws, you support this form of torture.
Thank you. I never have words to describe the sense of crawling horror at the idea of being forced to give birth against my will, but I think “torture” comes pretty close.
(can’t remember if reblogged…)
Wow. I hadn’t thought of it that way but damn.
but Chris Brown is a horrible musician along with being a horrible human being.
i’m not into him or his music but the dude can dance. i’ll give him that.
tumblr is going to be next.
BUT YOU ONLY TALK TO ME ONLINE ANYMORE :(
Today I told Ben, “you’re not too old for me. Jay-Z is older than Beyonce.”
And he kind of paused, pursed his lips, nodded, and said: “yeah, okay, that’s true.”
End of discussion.
this band i used to see all the time in oc is playing a show in la late tomorrow. it’s at a venue i’ve never heard of or been to but they’re telling everyone they’ll get ‘em in free and i’ve known ‘em forever so money’s not an issue but i don’t like going to new venues alone. baaaah.